Time to think

Since Kai arrived, I’ve filled every spare moment. A podcast while washing bottles, a chapter before bed, a quick game once the house goes quiet. It felt productive, but I realised I never gave myself time to actually think.

Now, most mornings (if it isn’t raining), I put Kai in the sling and walk Luca for as long as Kai will sleep. At first I kept my headphones in. Lately I’ve left them at home.

Instead, I talk out loud. Talking to babies is great for their development, so if Kai’s awake, I talk about what we can both see. If he’s asleep, I just talk through whatever’s on my mind. I probably look slightly mad, but saying things out loud forces me to finish a thought rather than bury it under another episode of something.

I think filling every gap was partly avoidance. But we can’t just run away from what we’re dealing with. Those thoughts wait, and they usually come back at 3am.

Life is busy, and it’s only getting busier. That’s exactly why we have to carve out a little time just to think. It doesn’t need to be a walk. It just needs to be on purpose.